Tag: executive coaching

By Scott

. . . and When We Want Feedback – Step 1

(Thanks to Seth Godin for planting the seed for this post – this is post 2 on this topic, see Post 1 if you want to start at the beginning)

I have talked to dozens of groups about feedback, and in almost every case someone comes to me and asks me to give them feedback based on my interactions with them.  I applaud their willingness to seek feedback, but it is the wrong place to start because there is no context.  Some feedback is too broad.  So if you want feedback, here are some tips for gathering valuable feedback.

Step 1:  Mentally be ready

Feedback is not about feeling good (that’s applause), it is about getting better.  There are ways to effectively give feedback that allows us to not only reflect on successes (things we need to KEEP doing), but also identify where we can get better (START doing and STOP doing items).  Regardless of the method, to receive the feedback you have to first prepare yourself to get it, because it is always hard to hear.

Jodi Glickman wrote a book called Great On The Job, and in it she outlines some very simple advice on feedback.  Here are the phases/steps she outlines for getting valuable feedback.

Phase 1:  The Preparation

  1. Plant the Seed
  2. Schedule the Conversation
  3. Provide Specific Guidance (of What You’re Looking For)

Phase 2:  The Conversation

  1. Ask for Concrete Ways to Improve
  2. Say Thank You
  3. Wait, Digest, and Revisit

The number one miss I see happening is skipping Phase 1.  The key to this step is letting people know you will be asking and helping them understand what would help you the most.  If you are working on your nerves – ask them to watch for signs you are nervous.  If you are working on use of humor, ask them to track laughter and how effectively you used humor.  The key is to plant the seed and to pick a time to talk about it that is convenient for them and will be the best time for you to hear it.  fyi – sometimes coming off the high of a 2 hour presentation is not a good time for you to really listen to feedback.

I do a lot of presentations to groups, and when it is possible I take one of my children so they get to experience me at work and I have someone that will give me feedback.  In a presentation last year to a group of entrepreneurs I took my oldest daughter.  I told her before I started that I wanted her to watch me and give me feedback on one thing I could do to improve.  At the end, I took her to dinner and asked her what feedback she had for me.  Her response was “You did a good job Dad, but at the end when you went around the room to ask people What one thing you are taking away from our time together?, you talked too much so it dragged.  At that point people want to leave and you need to keep things moving.”

She was right – I did start too many 20-30 second conversations.  It was great, and it happened because I first focused on The Preparation.  Next time I will be better.

Whether it is a One on One or a performance conversation, Always start with preparation.  Remember, leading and being led is about having Honest Conversations that lead to Thoughtful Actions, that result in Improved Performance.

By Scott

3 Questions to Transform Your One on One

For at least the first half of 2014, my focus of posts will be around the one on one conversation and individual development.  Since I published the Talent Scorecard, I have become convinced that certain habits in leaders make the most difference – the one on one is a key habit, and I am going to focus providing resources for leaders and individuals to make these great conversations.

There are 3 keys to great one on ones:

1. The individual (not the leader) owns it (ie.  It is their time, not yours!)

2.  The leader never cancels without immediately rescheduling

3.  The leader focuses on: Alignment, Support, Feedback (giving and getting)

Let’s focus on Getting Feedback.  The three questions in the past I have shared that will help build a conversation around feedback for you as the leader are:  What should I KEEP doing?  What should I START doing?  What should I STOP doing?

The core focus of these questions are the basics of feedback 101 – Tell you what you are doing well and get feedback from your team on opportunities to be a better leader. Getting BETTER means– Being reminded what you are doing well, identify some opportunities to increase your effectiveness, and potentially identify actions/behaviors that are getting in your way of being an effective leader.

Sometimes these questions are not effective because they are so different.  Understand the spirit of the questions, and don’t be bound by the words if they do not sound like your voice.  Write your own.  Here are some alternatives, and the text in blue is the intent of the question:

  • What decisions/actions are people still wondering what the WHY was for that action?  (Are you an effective communicator?)
  • As we think about the next 3-6 months, what does the team need?  (What actions would make the most difference?  How effectively are you meeting their needs?)
  • We are doing some operational planning – What do you think should are top 3 priorities should be as a company?  As a team?  (Are you an effective communicator? How aligned is the team with your vision for what is important?  Do you have a vision?)
  • If we were going to pull the team together for a 30 minute update – What do you think they would want to hear about?  (Are you an effective communicator?)
  • What is one thing I did in the last 30 days that made your job harder?  (Do they trust you enough to tell you the truth?  What behaviors of yours are destructive?)

Remember, the goal is to make a safe environment by asking questions, listening thoughtfully (just asking clarifying questions), thanking them for being candid, and making sure to follow-up after you have thought through some things.  Pick one or two of these to ask – – and remember that you are listening for what you did that confused people and/or what do they need more clarity on?  Your questions to gain that clarity is:  Tell me a little more about that? and How could I/we have handled that differently?/What could we have done to get a different outcome?

Managing your talent/team is about having thoughtful conversations.  When we have thoughtful conversations, followed by meaningful actions, we get the higher performance that makes our organizations go forward.

What other habits or questions have you found that are most helpful in leading?

Creating Space for Honest Conversations: Some Tips
By Scott

Creating Space for Honest Conversations: Some Tips

As a leader, you are not a psychologist.  When we spend too much time trying to get into the heads of our people we are destined to drive ourselves and everyone else crazy.

That is the message I tell leaders in almost every class or coaching relationship I have had for the last 15 years.

Your goal:  Getting people to tell us where they are with things and what they need.  More simply put:  An honest conversation, leading to thoughtful actions, and resulting in higher performance. 

There are some questions that help create momentum towards an honest conversation.  Are you asking any of these?

    • What is energizing you now?
    • What is frustrating you now?
    • What do you need me to keep doing?  Start doing?  Stop doing?
    • What are the things you are hearing that I should know?
    • What should our team be celebrating in 6 months?  What do you want to be celebrating in 6 months?

After over a decade of watching intentional conversations happen in companies I am convinced of two things:

    1. It is impossible to get good answers to these questions without intentional one on one time with your team.
    2. In order for these questions to work, it takes a 3-6 month commitment to stick with one on one time and follow-up on any actions.

If you are looking for a great focus for next year, spend the first part of the year creating these conversations with your team.

Honest conversations   |   Thoughtful actions   |   Higher performance

 

fyi:  Here are some templates that might help

 

 

By Scott

An Open Door is not enough – How about an Open Ears policy?

Early on in my own entrepreneurial journey a client asked if I read Inc. Magazine. When I said no and listed the other, more traditional publications, he just replied “If you are going to be an entrepreneur you need to read Inc.”. I listened, and it continues to give me things every month that help me develop.open ears

This month Jason Fried (co-founder of 37signals – Basecamp) makes the case that if your door is open as a leader, it does not mean they are lining up to come in. The article reminds me of a phenomenon I continue to see in workplaces – people are reluctant to bother their leaders.

Here are three excuses(direct quotes!) I have heard from people why they don’t go in:

  • “They are always so busy, I don’t want to bother them.”
  • “If I take them my problem, they will try and fix it.”
  • “I don’t want to look like I can’t do my job.”

When we went virtual with our teams and our time, we forgot to change our terms. Open office is outdated and irrelevant as a concept, because the virtual world has made it insignificant. Here are two habits and two questions to help you translate an open door policy to an open ears policy.

  1. Habit: 20 minute One on Ones 1-2x per month (see my guidelines and template if you want to learn more about this one).
  2. Habit: Eat lunch with your team 2x per month.
  3. Q: What is the dumbest things you are working on? (thanks Michael Fertik, CEO of Reputation.com for this, INC. Nov 2013)
  4. Q: (for one on one) What things should I Keep doing? Start doing? Stop doing?

Do you have any to add?

Talent management is about great conversations, and it does not start with an open door anymore, it starts with our presence and open ears.  The challenge for followers is to have the courage to step into that open ears space and take advantage of the opportunity.  The challenge for leaders is to slow down and actually listen – really listen – and do something with what you hear.  Here is your big risk:  You can fake an open door policy – you can’t fake an open ears policy.

Here are some templates to help you listen better and make open ears work.

Note: Rework by Jason Fried is in my Library/Resource Center.  I also added a few more great reads this month:  The One Minute Manager Meets the Monkey and Self Leadership and the One Minute Manager by Ken Blanchard,  Leadership and Self Deception.

By Scott

A lens for your talent conversations: 30-30-40 Conversation™ Rule

I spent a year working with some friends on a product to help people have conversations.  It hit me as my kids grew up that having meaningful conversations actually became harder as they grew up.  I also watched grandparents have the same challenge.  Alas, like any great idea someone else came up with the same idea and put it into a nice plastic case.  Table Topics is actually a fun and effective thing to have around.  We own two.  🙂

That exercise taught me something.  Great conversations have a nice balance of past, present, and future topics.  The lens I use to view every talent management conversation is governed by a simple rule: 30-30-40.

30% Past: Performance is measured in the past.  Our learning is measured in the past.  Spending time there is important.  Celebrations happen here.  Learning happens here (especially: what did not work).  Self awareness gets generated here because fresh memories reveal where we are at our best and where we struggle.

30% Present: Today is important because in it are the unsolved problems or the worries we bring to work.  In this space are the questions like: What are your top priorities today?  What is hot?  What are you concerned or worried about?  Life happens here, and relationships are built here.  There is no guessing about the present – it is what it is.

40% Future: The biggest chuck by design.  Defining our future, dealing with worries or barriers, and asking people “How can I support you?” all happen in this space.  This is the #1 neglected piece of the 30-30-40 Conversation™ rule.  Goals get set here.  Barriers and development needs are defined proactively here.

The lens put into our glasses help us to see more clearly.  Try this lens on your next conversation around performance, team meeting, or one on one.  How do things look?

This lens is actually where the trU came from in The trU Group.  trUth and trUst happen when it is used.

Great conversations are such a gift.  Go share one.

By Scott

Beware of MORE Leadership

I was once asked during start-up of my own business what my sales plan was.  I thought for a second about my business plan, the problems that I wanted to solve, the clients I wanted to help – – and then, after a deep breath, I said “MORE”.  MORE is a great start-up word and a great growth word.  I have seen it uttered by 10 month old companies and 25 year old companies.  The last great recession we faced, MORE became a very important word as companies scrambled for cash.

The truth is – At some point, MORE is not enough.

1.  It is not enough when you are faced with a choice: doing work X that gets you excited, in a new industry, but not as profitable vs work Y that is what you do well, feels a little bit boring to your entrepreneurial energies, nurtures/expands your current customer base, and creates a healthy cash flow.  MORE provides no focus, only motion.

2.  It is not enough when your team looks to you, as the leader, for some direction around ‘How did we do?”  When you point to MORE, say thank you, and then head off in your new luxury car that MORE helped you afford – – they begin to see what MORE did for you, and then their part of MORE seems not enough.  Dilbert owes some if its success to MORE leadership.

3.  It is not enough when you are looking at your own succession/future, and the two people that could move into your role and your measure of their ability to understand MORE and follow your lead is the only measure you have.  MORE leaders hire MORE leaders.

4.  It is not enough when you want to sit back for a few months, catch your breath, and enjoy some of the fruits of your MORE labor.  Your team is left wondering when MORE became ENOUGH, and in a few weeks begins to believe ENOUGH is the goal now.  When you re-engage, probably starting with the lecture around accountability and ownership – they get confused, angry, and sometimes bitter.  MORE becomes an irritating word.  MORE erodes TRUST.

4.  No celebrations can be planned around MORE because it is always moving.

5.  When MORE is used as a goal for a career change, it moves you towards increases in the numerical parts of a job, but not necessarily the passion/energy/fit parts.  Inevitably the MORE reasons will move to NOT ENOUGH.

6.  No development plans or talent management activities can be directed by MORE goals.  Are MORE Nicer or MORE Communication real targets?

MORE has its place in circumstances where it is important to push forward through things and speed to opportunities is critical.  It is okay to be in a MORE state, but staying there for long periods of time is not healthy.

More can help you get to BETTER, but it will never get you to BEST.

 

By Scott

Leaders – How are your people feeling? 3 Tips for starting this conversation

In a career transition program I facilitate in Michigan, our second day starts and ends with the question How do you feel?.  It is a critical and strategic because it challenges people to put one word around where they are at that moment, and as facilitators we can use that word to know where we need to spend more time to circle back for some one on one conversations.  It is not about fixing someone’s answer, but more about giving a voice to knowing when there is a potential barrier to learning/doing the work.  This is one of those keeping the pulse strategies, that allows a group to move forward to important work, lets individuals share where they are at that moment, and in a very direct way ask for help or pause for a celebration.

So what can we do as leaders to create those moments?

First, Do you believe it is important to give your people space to air some of this stuff? If yes, read on.  If no, I encourage you to read one of two books: First Break All the Rules by Marcus Buckingham/Curt Coffman or Drive by Daniel Pink.  I share these not to make you a psychologist.  My advice to leaders is their best focus is NOT to try and get inside the heads of their people, but try and get what is inside the heads of their people on the table so it can be talked about. I probably opened a can of worms with that comment – consider the comment section of this blog as a space to explore that if you desire.  I am happy to defend/discuss it there.  Back to the question – How can a leader get feedback on what is on the minds of their team?

Here are 3 habits that will help you understand where your people are in terms of what is on their minds and/or how they are feeling:

1.  Meeting space (weekly/monthly) – The question: Create an agenda item at the beginning:  Around the room:  3 Wins this week/month and 1 frustration.  The execution: Just listen.  Be ready to plug a big frustration aired by the team into a brainstorming/problem solving space later in the meeting or ask the person to connect later in the day with you to spend some time.  If you are uncomfortable with asking/handling this question/space – get some training/mentoring soon.  Not being able to ask this question and process the answers effectively will be an issue.

2. Create regular space/time to connect directly with employees – The question: What is one question you have or you are hearing that needs an answer?  (note the strategy – people can ask their question (higher risk) or just share one from someone else.  The execution: Make this a monthly habit with coffee and donuts.  This space should be all non-direct reports and select based on anniversary dates for that month / birthdays / just became a leader in the last year / new employee that month/quarter.  The key is make it inclusive and give you a chance to listen.  Small company?  Pizza once a month and find a round table – and whoever is there gets the question.

3.  At monthly/weekly one on ones – The question: Give me one word – how are you feeling?  (Yes it is a little squishy for some, but trust me it is an effective question).  The execution: If you are not comfortable handling the conversation – you need some development help as a leader.  The ROI:  The $ spent getting better at this will save your organization $$$$ in the future and will probably have a positive impact on your relationships outside of work too. (marriage, kids, partner, name it . . . . )

 

Mini trU Tip: Why I think some coaching training for leaders is critical? When you invite people share things stuff will come out that requires you as a leader to: 1) Ask more questions to help the individual reveal what is at the core of this issue  2)  Help the individual identify one thing they can do to address it or explore it more so it can be solved at some point in the future.  If you want to spend some time learning about the voice of a coach I direct you to a blog I love by Mary Jo Asmus or a book I like called Co-Active Coaching.  My only caveat is that spending time in both of these resources will help you experience the voice of a coach, and especially the Co-Active Coaching book will help you understand the process of coaching.  In the end, if you want to become proficient at it plan on starting with a year-long commitment to learn about it and practice it.

By Scott

New word for your leadership toolbox – Capacity

In a recent conversation I was sharing a story with a mentor and friend about how I handled a difficult moment in a facilitation.  As I reflected back on how I reacted to the individual causing the problem in the session, the outcomes, and how some of my facilitation work in the past year prepared me she shared with me a reflection of her own:  Scott, you have increased your capacity to manage a space filled with many different perspectives and voices.

That word caught me off guard.  I started my career in a capacity planning role worried about the output of a steel mill and then 80+ injection molding machines.  It was a very familiar word for me, and yet it was one that I had only use with very physical and definable assets . . . And I like it!

If you are focused on your own ongoing growth of skills and knowledge, or have a team of people that you are helping prepare for future roles or challenges, this is a word that you should add to your toolbox.  Here are two examples of conversations where it could be valuable:

  1. Preparing a team for change: What is the capacity of this team to handle this change?  What will it require of us?  What proven skills and talents do we have?  What is one area we need to increase our capacity?
  2. Your own development: What part of your job are you “at capacity” and feel like you cannot possibly have any more to give?  What part of your job are you avoiding because it is unfamiliar, uncomfortable, and/or undesirable – but important?  If you added 10% capacity in that area what would that look like?  How can that be accomplished?

Coaching is about increasing capacity in clients.  I get great satisfaction when I hear people say they see themselves differently and, as a result, are able to navigate situations effectively that would have tripped them up in the past.  One of my all-time favorite books on development is Mastery by George Leonard.  Inherent in a journey to mastery is a commitment to always be open and able to increasing your own capacity.

Capacity is a tried and true manufacturing word, and a great word for the world of managing talent in an economy putting so much emphasis on the knowledge and capacity of people.

How does the term capacity show up in your conversations today?

What other words are cornerstones to your talent conversations?

mini-trU Tip: The only way to know your true capacity is to exceed it because you push the boundaries.  That was true when I first started my career worrying about the capacity of equipment, and it is equally true as I enter the second decade of a career focused on the capacity of people.  A good topic for another blog posting . . . .

 

By Scott

How do I know you are a high potential? My 5 Qualifiers

As I watched them present, I realized that in the 16 hours since I last saw them – they got better.  It made me smile.

Sunday I had the opportunity to join a group of coaches to help 21 students looking for jobs in Michigan prepare to address 500+ business leaders and tell their story in 3 minutes.  The workshop included them presenting their story 4-6 times and having their peers and their coach give them feedback on what they did well and what is one thing they could do to improve next time.  Not surprisingly, they got better.  But what really made me smile is that after we sent them off (paired up with another student to do one on one coaching with each other), they returned and they demonstrated a huge leap in performance from the previous day.  In my 10 plus years being around high potentials through leadership development programs, it reminded me that is what high potentials do.

Are you a high potential?  Here are five things that tell me you qualify:

  1. You learn when I am not looking: If you read some of the research by Michael Lombardo and Robert Eichinger they call this Learning Agility.  It is measurable and backed by research.  When I am helping leaders teams think about potential and what it looks like I use the book The Leadership Machine.  If you are charged with developing leaders in your organization, this should be in your library because it is backed with research and it will help you focus on the right things in your efforts to find and develop leaders.
  2. I experience your infectious energy: High potentials might not be the smartest person in the room, but they are never accused of being disengaged or along for the ride.  They see problems as opportunities, and that rubs off on the people around them.
  3. You listen: In any relationship a key part of listening is receiving feedback.  I know people hear something because instantly it is reflected in their performance and they say thank you in such a sincere manner that you know they appreciated it and are going to strongly consider it.  Listening is also apparent from the questions that people ask.  When you ask questions that help clarify or lead the speaker to an area they need to address next or completely missed, it means you are listening.
  4. I see you teaching: I watched strangers give each other great feedback, both on the positive and the negative (ie. improvement) aspects of their performance.  It was great, and it was extremely accurate.  I also found myself learning.  They showed me how about effective networking and gave me some tips about how colleges are preparing students today.
  5. I see results: In the end, high potentials figure out the learning curve and get to a result.  Most of the time it is quicker than what is expected, and often time the answer redefines what would be considered a great outcome.  The improvement and final deliverable of the performance is the special sauce.

One thing I did not include is “Everyone likes you.”  I left that out because high potentials have to learn to manage relationships effectively with peers and subordinates, but often times that lesson is part of the learning / development program.  It is critical that leaders like and respect you, so the ability to manage up and do the work is critical from the beginning.  Ultimately, high potentials should not move up without learning the craft of building respect at all levels and demonstrating the ability to build healthy relationships and teams – but that is for another blog.

If you want to see some of these students speak, here is a link.

Do you have anything to add to my list based on your experience?

4 Keys To Successful Transitions
By Scott

4 Keys To Successful Transitions

Not Cool Robert Frost

If you have not seen the Kid President video on YouTube you should.  It has been played in our house through Apple TV no less than 12 times, with the funniest being watching my 86 year old father viewing it with his grandchildren saying “Isn’t this great Grandpa!”  It might not connect with all generations, but he was gracious. 🙂

There is a part in the video where Robert Frost’s famous poem, The Road Not Taken, is referenced and the kid president talks about how hard that road is with all the rocks, thorns, etc. . .   He then delivers the line – “Not cool Robert Frost”.  That line resonated and has been often repeated by my teenage daughter.  In the last two weeks, almost daily I have found situations where I repeat it.

Not cool Robert Frost

I love transitions.  People.  Teams.  Companies.  There is much to be gained in a great transition, and there is lots at stake because it is not an easy road.  Even in a successful transition there will be moments of failure.  My experience tells me that there are four key things that have to be there for a successful transition (whether it is corporate or individual):

  1. Desire to make the change
  2. Community of support for individuals doing the change (including at least 2 people willing to provide one on one support)
  3. Willingness and ability to learn, unlearn, and relearn (thanks for those words Greg Hartle) as part of the process.
  4. Resilience to do the work, regardless of the conditions (this is leadership)

As I look at this list, I see number 2 and 3 as the things anyone can be working on today regardless of their situation.  In fact, if you are not doing the work of making those a part of your work life, you are guaranteeing yourself / team / organization a difficult journey.

A story.  I was talking to someone who had successfully transitioned to a new role, only to have it go away months later.  The one thing they stopped doing when they landed?  Building/maintaining their community (#2).   Networking and maintaining your community is easy to stop when we are ‘busy’.   But it is the road that will become overgrown if not used at least a little.  It is also the piece that takes time to rebuild.  We create more rocks and thorns for ourselves when we stop doing all of the work of preparing ourselves, our teams, or our organizations for the transitions that will occur.

It is okay to rest, but don’t stop doing the work of preparation.  And when you hit a rock or a thorn, just blame Robert Frost and keep moving. 🙂